A pinprick of light amidst darkness

Ever heard of an oxymoron? Here's one for you...

I walk down those steep steps. Constantly looking over my shoulders, knowing that they would follow although i cant see them. I keep walking, concentrating on not falling, loving the adrenaline flowing through my veins. Then i reach the base of the steps, where its so dark, i can't even make out my hands in front of my face. My hair is swept back by that amazing breeze, and i hope beyond hope, that that amazing breeze could just blow my memories away. Leave me as a blank slate, a slate that i could colour and mould as i like!

I keep walking, and then i reach the edge of the building. I look down, and all i can see is the gorgeous sight of the waves lapping over the rocks below. A truly mesmerising sight, something i could stare at all my life, and never get bored.

Then it strikes me, if i were to place my right foot any further forward, then i would have found a way to get rid of those troubling memories, a way out of this hell hole. And yet, i cant do it, as simple as it sounds, i just cannot move my foot any further forward, no matter how hard i try to convince myself that it will be painless, for even i know that I'm lying to myself.

And so, i move away from the edge, i move towards a safe zone, where everything is boring and predictable, i move into towards the me that had been thought out FOR me, the me that everyone except me liked, i moved back towards a life full of bleakness.

Yet, if it were so bleak, why couldn't i make myself take that last step? That step that would have made everything okay. Then i realised that i had seen a pinprick of light amidst the darkness...

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